The 7 Biggest Myths about Wedding Planners

Do you picture Jennifer Lopez or David Tutera when you hear the words “wedding planner”? There’s a chance you think of the glamorous events of famous people or that character who took over the whole wedding in that one movie. Or maybe you have absolutely no frame of reference at all! Honestly, there’s a lot people don’t know about wedding planners and a lot of misconceptions. I’m going to address some of the biggest rumors and give you the inside scoop on what we wedding planners are actually like!

Myth #1: We’re domineering and rude.

-It would be difficult to stay in business as a rude wedding planner. But, like in everything, there are always some less than nice exceptions to the rule. That is why it is so important to meet with any of your vendors and make sure you’re a good fit before booking! It’s important that you get along with and actually like whoever will be there on your big day. Traits to look for in an ideal planner: someone who is genuine, likable, and works well with others while still being professional, competent, and self assured. That’s the kind of person you need running the show.

Myth #2: We walk all over your ideas and insist on doing everything our way.

-This might be the most common myth I hear about planners and the truth is an absolutely giant NOPE. A wedding planner is there to be your right hand, your experienced guide. We’ve been through this process before-many many times. We’re here to give our advice, share our resources, and help you navigate all that is involved with making your dream a reality. And I mean YOUR dream-our job is to figure out what you want and make whatever that is happen. Many planners do have a signature style that carries through a lot of their weddings, but our priority is always our couples’ vision and -more than likely-brides (and/or grooms) pick us at least in part because we share a similar style. A wedding planner is more like a planning partner-here to help, not take over!

Myth #3: A planner will bust your budget.

-Some people think planners are only for extravagant events and that we may even make you spend more money by pressuring you into expensive options you can’t afford. Once again, that is not true. Part of our job is to learn you budget (whatever that budget may be) and make sure we stick to it. And sometimes we can even help you save money! Having an extra pair of eyes keeping track of everything when you’re in the throes of wedding planning can be a real life saver. And, because we work so many different events, we get really good at finding the best quality vendors and can factor in everything you need with everything we know and find the right options at the right price point for you.

Myth #4: We choose vendors for you because we get a kick back from them.

-In my personal experience: this is not a common thing. Vendors who frequently work together will sometimes offer discounts to couples who book with both of them, but the vendors themselves never receive any benefit aside from both getting to work and work with people we know are professional and will do a good job. I can only think of a few times where I’ve heard of a vendor offering any incentive to the planner themselves (hotels are the only ones that come to mind) and the planner passed those savings on to the client. No matter the circumstance, I have never known any legitimate planner who would recommend anyone to their couples that we didn’t really feel was right for them. Hiring a less than stellar vendor can hurt the event and, ultimately, our reputation. No theoretical kick back is worth that.

Myth #5: Wedding planning is just a fun, easy, frivolous and fabulous job!

-Imagine spending 12 hours on your feet, running around (but still looking totally put together and calm around the guests), dealing with what can feel like never-ending crises, setting up an entire event and making sure every little detail is right, checking in with every vendor to see where everyone is at, coralling the wedding party (they love to wander off!), and keeping every family member and every guest happy- all in formal wear (and sometimes in the absence of climate control). This doesn’t even begin to cover some of the hard work and stress that go into wedding planning just on the day itself (not to mention the months-sometimes years-of work that go into it beforehand). Not every event requires constant crisis control and not every wedding has quite as many tasks for me to personally handle but no matter what your wedding day is one of the most important days of your life. It is my great honor to help make sure everything turns out the way you want. That can take a lot of work. And put on a lot of pressure. Weddings are high stakes for everyone involved, maybe for the planners most of all-whatever happens is on us. We feel (and look) responsible for if the event goes well or…less than well. We do everything we can to make everything run smoothly and turn out perfectly. And hopefully everything is as magical and perfect as you’ve dreamed. Hopefully for you your wedding day is easy and you can just enjoy it. But for me? Not easy. Extremely rewarding and a job I’m so lucky to have, but definitely not just fun and frivolous! And becoming a legitimate planner in the first place is more than following a whim-most have had some education and been certified, and all of us have worked under another planner before taking on our own clients. A lot goes into becoming a professional planner and I promise when you hire one you can absolutely tell the difference!

Myth #6: All wedding planning services and planners are the same.

-All people are different and so are all planners! Some planners are serene and calming, others are energetic and bubbly. You can’t paint us all with the same brush and the same goes for any packages planners may offer. Every planner has different strengths and a different method, so everyone structures their packages differently and offers different things. A planner who thrives on running the show the day of an event-handling every problem and being the boots on the ground-may specialize more in coordination services. Other planners strengths may lie in their abilities to craft your wedding vision and may focus on design Some are ultra organized and big picture focused to fully plan your entire event. One planner might prefer a low key, rustic, vibe and others may prefer a more grand or formal affair. Some of us might enjoy it all! Every planner has their own thing that makes us who we are and makes us great. So, check out any prospective planners’ websites and social media and find out if you like what we do. Then make an inquiry and schedule a meeting to determine that we’re a good fit. Just like anything important-when you’ve found the right one, you’ll know!

Myth #7: Planners are unnecessary: you and your family and friends can handle everything!

-Remember when I broke down how difficult coordinating a wedding can be? I can’t imagine having to do all of that and also being a part of the wedding (when my sister got married last year I absolutely had someone else coordinate the day!) That is a stress none of you should have to deal with for your wedding. A lot goes in to having an event run smoothly and somehow, no matter how well it has been organized or how prepared you are, something always goes wrong. There is no substitute for the experience and expertise that a professional planner has and the peace of mind that comes with knowing that we have got it handled. You don’t need to worry. We always find a way to pull it all together-usually without you or your loved ones ever knowing anything went awry in the first place. And that is priceless.

Click here to inquire about how I can give you the gift of peace of mind for your wedding day.